I dont know how am I going to carry on with my life. It's been exactly 2 weeks that dad is not back at home. I don't know how am I going to really accept the fact that he is not here anymore. People said that I should stop crying and accept the fact. Talk is easy. Try be in my shoes. You don't understand, do you? Why must people tell me to stop crying when I felt that crying is the best solution to make me feel better, besides saying my prayers.

Do you know that I'm atcually crying badly inside? I'm really really upset with the death of my late dad. I wished he is here with me. I miss him alot. I miss you, dad. Do you know that he was the one stand by my side always? he was the one that helped me alot. The only man that I'm truly close with is my late dad. I'm part of him. I need my dad. I thought all these was just a dream. I thought Im having a nightmare right now. But actually not, it's the reality. He's gone forever.

I don't need other things, all I need is my perfect family. My dad, my mother, my brother and myself. I love you, dad. I will pray to you and God that I would meet you one day. Please wait for us, your family at the heaven's gate, dad. Wait for us. I couldn't stop thinking all those memories, the time we spent together. It was just too sweet and memorable that I could cried and felt touched by it.

You were my perfect man. Why must god put me into such test? Why must I be the one that lost my dad? Why not them, you? I still need my dad. I'm not ready to face it all by myself. Whenever dad is in the house or with me, I feel totally secured. I miss you very much dad. I really do. It eats me inside. Don't tell me to stop thinking about my dad cause I never will. Don't tell me to stop crying cause I wont stop.

Have you ever really think carefully how my future would be when dad is not here? Dad used to pamper me alot. I am Daddy's girl, and will always be. When I was young, I cried every night when my late dad was working on night shift. Because I want him by my side. Now, he is totally gone. I would never forget him, I promise.

Some took the death of my dad as a way for them to realise their mistakes. But why must they acted this way only after my dad's death? Why don't god snatch other people's dad and the rest could realised from that tragedy also? Why must me??? I dont understand why, I know it's a sinned to say all these. But I just want them to know that, it's never easy to tell me to stop crying or whatever, cause they don't understand how it feels. They may raise the issue like how much they would love their parents now, but they didn't know that I'm hurt by that.

Dad, i love you. i miss you. how i wish you are here right now. sometimes, i wish that i could be with you up there. i dont know how am i going to carry on with my life.